Sexiest Man Alive

I've seen the sexiest man alive naked!

No, I'm not talking about Sunny...although if People Magazine had any taste, they would hand that title to a chubby man. Instead, they named Matthew McConaughey.

Nevertheless, it adds fresh currency to one of my many brushes with fame. The tale of how I spent a week in a hotel with McConaughey, and saw his bongos up close and personal, now becomes "I've seen the sexiest man alive naked!" The explanation mark is only for effect mind you. While I'm sure plenty of people find him attractive--and he is a handsome guy--he is not my cup of tea.

Matthew and I were in a screenwriting class together at UT. His script was something about how a frat boy is unfairly accused of racism. Imagine that. Mine was a Simpsons spec, "Legend of Bartman."

In any case, we both wound up attending a UT Alumnus seminar in Los Angeles, and roomed together. He was an OK guy. I am the shy, quiet type; and back then probably a little too uptight for McConaughey, who would be a breakout star the following year, and who liked to smoke a little pot, drink, and walk around the room naked while he brushed his teeth. Would he have done it if he knew that I am gay? Probably. I get the feeling he just likes showing off his bod. What actor doesn't like an audience?

That's it. That's all there is. It certainly isn't as interesting as Austin PD hauling him in for playing his bongos naked, and smoking a little pot. Not salacious enough for the Enquirer; but a little piece of trivia for some future Trivial Pursuit...The Matthew McConaughey Edition.

Now. about that Sexiest Man Alive title, when will People put John Goodman on that cover? Paul Guilfoyle? Paul Sorvino? And when will I get to see any one of them naked?